Difficult Times
Introduction: It has been said that we are all either going into, in the midst of or coming out of a storm. Suffering and difficult times can be the one thing that can keep us from deepening in our faith. The question of why a good God allows certain things has been asked by all of humanity. Today, we are going to look at the “whys”, “whats” and “hows” of difficult storms in our lives. Watch Nooma Video entitled, “Rain.”
Discussion:
I. Why does God allow suffering?
a. On this sheet of paper, I want you to write down the top 5 difficult times in your life on one side. Keep it brief, just a word or sentence, no need to explain and you will not have to share these unless you want to. What are some of the general themes of our suffering? (Loss, disappointment, physical pain, military life)
b. So, what is usually the first question that both Christians and non-Christians ask in the midst of a storm? (WHY?) Why? Why did God allow this to happen? Just off the top of your head, without giving specific answers about specific sufferings in your life, what are some of the “whys”?
i. Let’s read Isaiah 55:8-13. First thing we need to understand about suffering: God’s ways are not our ways. While He MAY reveal to us some of the why’s in our various difficult storms, He will not reveal them ALL. There are reasons that will extend beyond our comprehension on this earth. Secondly, we need to recognize that EVERYTHING that happens on this earth that God allows is for one purpose and one purpose only: His glory. Keep these things in mind as we talk about difficult times.
c. Let’s take a look at some of the reasons God may reveal to us as to “why” he allows us to go through a storm:
i. To refine us:
1. Proverbs 17:3
2. 1 Peter 1:6-8
a. Trials and sufferings are tests. What would you say the main thing they test are based on these verses? (our faith and our heart)
b. Why would God need to even test our faith? (because of all the junk and impurities that exist in our lives).
c. We’ve got to keep in mind God’s ultimate goal for us. Let’s read Matthew 22:36-38. His goal for us is not our temporary happiness or comfort on this earth. Instead, based on this verse, what is it? (to love Him with all we have)
d. Sometimes sufferings come as a way to lead us to complete devotion to Him and Him alone. Like the gold being refined in the the furnace, He will use the fire of trials to strip away all the impurities in our lives.
ii. To grow, mature us or for a higher good:
1. Romans 5:1-5: According to these verses, what is the ultimate result of suffering? (Hope) Notice this process though. It starts with suffering. The more and more we suffer, the more we persevere through trials. As we continue to persevere, God adds character to us. It is through this character that we ultimately find hope. Hope is what the world needs more than anything. Sometimes it is through our hope in the midst of what looks to be a horrible mess that others can come to know Christ. We’ve all said it, “If she can have hope in the middle of that trial, surely I can in the middle of my seemingly smaller one.”
2. James 1:2-4: Suffering is used to complete us, making us lack nothing in our spiritual walk.
iii. To show his power:
1. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10: God’s power is revealed in our weakness. Think about this. He can show His redemptive power in the midst of a powerful storm more so than He can through a life that is comfortable and untouched by difficulty. Which is more amazing: the man who falls from a 20 story building and lives or the one who falls from his bed and lives? God’s hand can be seen more in the stories that are riddled with hardship and heartache.
iv. To become more like Christ:
1. Philippians 3:7-12: To truly live out the Christian faith, we HAVE to be willing to lose it all, everything on this earth. We need to strive towards understanding our Savior and what He went through on our behalf, rather than striving towards a life that is completely comfortable and free from all heartache. Jesus experienced the most excruciating pain anyone on this earth has ever felt. He underwent torture, hatred, abuse, and the most horrific thing we as Christians can imagine, separation from His father as He took on every sin we ever committed. A lot of times we as Christians have this goal of using Christ to get us the life we want instead of the life God wants us to have.
II. What does suffering reveal?
a. His Character:
i. Most of us have a very warped view of who God is and what He is about. Some things God is not:
1. He is not an insurance policy, where if you pray enough, go to church enough, tithe enough, He will keep bad things from happening.
2. He is not a vending machine, where we insert our prayer coin, and push the button and He will give us what we want.
3. He is not a cosmic killjoy, watching from high above in an effort to catch us messing up so he can smite us.
ii. Suffering can reveal to us some of the truths of God’s character:
1. His sovereignty:
a. Psalm 3:4-5: Our next breath is dependent on God. How can suffering show us His sovereignty that is control in all situations?
2. His goodness:
a. Romans 8:28: Not all things will be good, but they will all be worked for our good. There is a difference.
iii. Suffering can reveal our own failures and needs:
1. Our sins and idols:
a. Jeremiah 2:13: Sometimes suffering is the direct or indirect result of our sin. Sometimes it can force us to pry back our hands that are clutching idols, that is things in our lives that we have elevated to a position reserved only for our creator. What are some things we can put in the place of God that He can sometimes force us to suffer without in order to regain His rightful position in our lives? (HUSBANDS- God will use deployment as a way for us to take away that idol of our husbands and replace it with our reliance on HIM alone, children, stuff, etc.)
2. Our need for Him:
a. Think back to the video. When did the baby realize he needed his father? Was it during the sunny, beautiful part of their walk or was it in the midst of the thunder and lightning? God is a relational God. Above all else, more than He wants you to do good, more than He wants you to follow His commands, He wants to have a relationship with you. Suffering will reveal our need for a relationship with Him more quickly and more dramatically than a life that has never seen hardship.
b. C.S. Lewis said, “"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world."
III. What should we do through our own suffering?
a. Allow it to grow and refine our faith. Use it to ask God hard questions. Job did. Just be prepared if God says I can’t tell you the answers.
b. Allow it to draw us nearer to Him:
i. Psalm 22:24
ii. Psalm 34:17-19
c. Allow it to reveal our ministry:
i. 2 Corinithians 1:3-7: Your suffering will show you your ministry. You have all experienced military life and the hardships and challenges that go with it. Guess where God wants you to serve? Military wives. But beyond that, you each have a unique story, a unique experience, a unique suffering and guess what, God is going to use you uniquely in other ministries. If you’ve suffered a miscarriage or the loss of a child or fertility issues, guess who God might have you serve. If you’ve been through a divorce or difficulties in your marriage, guess who God might have you serve. If you’ve overcome addiction, eating disorders, or alcoholism, guess what? In addition, the fact that you have suffered will open you up to ministry of anyone who has suffered.
ii. Remember, it does not last:
1. Revelation 21:3-4: Suffering is temporary. It will only occur while we are on this earth. Eventually, God will remove all our suffering and all our tears and they will not even be a memory. We HAVE to keep this in mind.
IV. How do we minister to those who are suffering?
a. Never assume someone is ok based on their outward appearance. Consider Plato’s words, “Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” We all are going through, coming out of or in the midst of our own battles.
b.
c. Don’t offer contrite responses or minimize their pain with “It could always be worse, at least ________, etc.” Recognize and acknowledge their hurt.
i. Proverbs 14:10: Don’t think of someone else’s suffering as minimal. Suffering is relative. Each person’s struggles will be dependant upon what they have been through in the past and what God has done in their lives. Just because you might see something as not a big deal, it may be a tragedy in the life of another.
d. Offer to journey with them.
i. Job 2:11-13: This was perhaps the best thing Job’s friends did in the midst of his suffering. They just journeyed with him through his pain. They wept with him. Their hearts were broken for him.
ii. Romans 12:15
e. Pray for them:
i. Often we cannot conjure up the right words or do anything to help someone but the best thing we can do is pray unceasingly.
f. Encourage them through scripture:
i. Send notes of scripture or emails. Just be sensitive to timing. When someone has just experienced a death of someone near to them, it may not be the best time to say, “God works all things for our good.” Allow the time of mourning, but then encourage them appropriately and as God leads you to scripture verses for them.
Conclusion: Look back at your list of your 5 greatest hardships. Just off the top of your head, on the other side of the paper write why God may have allowed it or what He has revealed through it. Does it point you to your ministry? Has he grown, refined or matured your faith? Did He reveal His character or power through it?
Life Work:
Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen…
Scripture Memory Verse:
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
James 1:2-4 NIV
1. Make a detailed list of all the storms you’ve been through that you consider significant in your life.
2. Next to each storm, pray and ask God to reveal one thing which He has brought through that storm: refining, growth or maturing of your faith or the faith of someone around you, revelation of His power in your life, forming us to be more like Christ, an aspect of his character, an idol we have or a sin, our need for Him or something else?
3. What is your natural response to suffering or difficulty? Do you cry out to God? Do you allow Him to carry you? Or do you fight it with every ounce of your being? How can you allow trials to do their work in you better? Can you find joy in the midst of difficult times?
4. Looking back at your list of storms, what ministries are you equipped for? As a woman, you are equipped to minister to women first and foremost. As a military wife or member of the military, you are equipped to minister to those in the military life. Now look at specific experiences: victim of sexual abuse, child of divorce, struggles with eating disorders, addictions or alcohol or maybe it is something less “severe”. Maybe you have always struggled with depression or anxiety. Maybe you have suffered from a low self-esteem or self-worth. Pray for God to reveal specific groups of women He wants you to minister to and then be ready for Him to put them in your path!
5. How do you need to minister in someone’s pain right now? Or how do you need to be ministered to? Do you need to/need someone to journey through pain with? Do you need to/need someone to pray? Do you need to/need someone to encourage through scriptures? If you are in need, be sure you seek out someone you trust to minister to you during your difficult storm. People can’t read minds and sometimes we can suffer because we don’t let anyone know we are suffering!
